Time Warner Cable for the past few months, has been testing the idea of bandwidth caps.  In it, you’re allotted a certain amount of data per month, then get charged overage for every GB over the cap that you go.  If that sounds like cell phone companies and their “minutes” then you’re beginning to see that moronic minds think alike.

Imagine if your Internet connection was milk.  You buy a quart of milk for $1, drink it in a few days, and go back to buy more.  The grocery store then tells you, “Oh, you’re only allowed ONE quart per month.  We can’t handle the burden that you’re putting on the cows.  So, the second quart will be $10.”

Now, I would have less reason to complain under this system, if TW used a system like Comcast’s (did I just write that?).  Comcast caps usage at 250GB/month.  That’s reasonable.  That’s like giving you the first 50 gallons of milk each month, and charging overage after those 50 gallons.  Unless I’m the OctoMom, I’m not going to be buying that much milk, and therefore extremely unlikely to be hitting that cap.

However Time Warner has recently trumpeted that their “tests” went so well, that they’ll soon be rolling bandwidth caps out to the entire country!  Hooray for the country!  And those caps will be .. from 5GB to 40GB?  Excuse me?  And, users will get charged $1 per GB over the cap.  It’s so ridiculously low, it’s almost comical.  If I weren’t a TW Cable user, I’d slap my head and go, “Boy, are their customers screwed!”

I am tech savvy.  And I would say that I surf more than “the average person”.  However, I am by no means a bandwidth hog.  And I use, on average, about 25 GB/month.  So, I’d either have to buy the 20 GB plan, and get charged another $5 on overage, or I could get the 40GB plan, for $10/month more and stay under the cap.  Or, I could just stick this pencil in my eye.  Option 3 might be the cheapest.

So many people are complaining to Time Warner, that they’ve setup a “special” email address so that they can mass delete respond to you, our valued customer.

So, I forwarded the following letter to realideas@twcable.com:

Obviously, no human will be reading this…  But I’m going to say this anyway… 5 - 40GB / month?  You’re kidding, right?  Was this was somehow related to April Fools Day?  Or are you just the fools?  You claim that bandwidth hogs are stealing the data from everyone else’s shared connections, and that anyone who uses more data than this per month is a hog.  By your definition then, bandwidth hogs are everyone, except soccer moms who check their FaceBook pages once a day.

My household has 4 PCs.  We surf the web and check email.  We watch a few YouTube videos.  We watch perhaps 2 or 3 Hulu videos per month.  We do not stream Netflix nor play online games.  We are the very definition of “normal use”.  And our average usage is about 25 GB / month.  By your math, that makes us hogs.  And with your caps and overage charges, that means our bill would go up.

I can switch right now to AT&T FastAccess DSL for cheaper than I pay for Road Runner.  AT&T U-verse and Clearwire are moving into the Charlotte area by the end of this year.  Your time as a monopoly is almost done.

I find it the very definition irony that your home page for my area has the tag line “Get More. Pay Less.”  Your cap proposal is for me to get less, and pay more for it.  I refuse to pay one cent more.  If you don’t want the expense and hassle of having “excessive” amounts of my data on your network, then I would be happy to remove all of my data from your network entirely.

As I said, I find it highly unlikely that human eyes belonging to anyone in the employ of Time Warner Cable will look at this.  But I’m hoping that some intern will check that realideas account every day and report to the higher-ups, “Wow, there’s 15,000 new messages this morning!  People are really ticked off!”

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